~ Integrative Leadership by Design

Archive for the ‘balance’ Category

The Power of Our Patterns….

Living in the Tropics; life and leadership lessons explored

Why do we do what we do?

Ever hear yourself lament, “I did it again.  When will I learn?” What compels us to repeat the same patterns which can be the cause of emotional pain, heartache even poor health…. repeatedly over our lifetimes?

Some may think that living in the tropics, all your problems and frustrations vanish on the ocean breeze.  True, the environment does help with perspective and attitude, however, issues, habits and roadblocks are still part of the picture, just with a different frame.  Our habits and patterns follow us wherever we go.

Charles Duhigg shares with us in “The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business”  that there are 3 components to understanding our habits:

1)   The Cue
2)   The Routine
3)   The Reward

Check out this video by Duhigg as he explores the 3 components.

For many years, my colleagues and I have been studying “Why” we do what we do. Fueling one’s soul in a day brings energy, light, fulfillment and joy, right?  But what happens if when following our bliss, we fall into a cyclical pattern that causes us to become off center?  Suddenly the joy is turning to frustration and downward we go.

It is at this point where one can take a pause, slowing down to notice (and reflect on) habits and patterns. This is a great way to use axiology in real time. Let’s break down the 3 components of our habits; the cue is our thought (systemic), the routine is what we do (extrinsic) and the reward is our why, our greater purpose (intrinsic).

You may ask yourself….

  • Am I experiencing states of disconnect or frustration?
  • Is there anything in my life causing me to push myself off center?
  • Can I envision a repeated pattern emerging?

Breaking down a habit/pattern and looking at it with a subjective viewpoint can help us gain clarity, self- awareness and perhaps even acceptance for whatever we are experiencing in life.  Know what your cue is, explore your routines and check in with what your reward is.  Give it a try and see what comes up for you.  You never know what barrier you may break through….

What is needed here now?

Gisele
919-809-6902

Aligning….
Purpose – Perseverance – Passion

Transformation & The Space In Between…

Living in the Tropics; life and leadership lessons explored…

“You have to reject one expression of [the band] first, before you get to the next expression. In between you have nothing, you have to risk it all”    — Bono

Insert ‘your life’ or ‘your company’ for [the band] and it just brings goosebumps doesn’t it? This was such a powerful quote that esteemed filmmaker Davis Guggenheim positioned it twice in the U2 documentary “From the Sky Down.”

Relocating from Vancouver to Bermuda, I found myself in the space between in my search for a clearer picture of this new reality reflective of lifestyle choices. The gift was in slowing down and being present to heart, mind and body intelligence. However painful it felt and was for me; this traversing from one version of self to another, integrating change from the places of humility, gratitude, forgiveness, intuition, creativity and above all else, LOVE — a new map of life became clearer with each new day.

A favorite book that comes to mind is “hope for the flowers” by Trina Paulus. It is a story of hope and the integration process, within the space in between, as Stripe and Yellow journey from being caterpillars to butterflies.

The Integration process is about redrawing your map of life and filling the empty space with new meaning. With all things in life being impermanent, this process requires the need for you to rebuild confidence and develop acceptance and resilience. The secret of resilience is the ability to see a crisis, or space in between as an opportunity for a new beginning. Remember, a new beginning can only happen when the old form disintegrates.

Some questions you may ask when you find yourself exploring the space in between:

  • What have I learned?
  • How will I fill the space with meaning?
  • Who am I being?

Sometimes it’s not about letting go, it’s about letting it be. We can’t force the events in our lives; all we can do is be present to the flow. Even in the darkest hours of life—if we are truly present—joy shines in the depths…

May joy follow and surround you everywhere.

Gisele
919-809-6902

Aligning….
Purpose – Perseverance – Passion